think, think, think

I try hard to feel completely empowered by everything that happens to me.  Even if something bad and completely obscure happens I try to think of what I possibly could have done to have prevented it.  And probably more importantly what I could learn from the situation.   That way no matter how crappy my day I don't view myself as a victim and I usually feel actually happy that I had in someway made some personal progress. 
Today was not that day.  I hope you will forgive my vagueness, but here's the gist of it:  First of all I was shopping at Target when I realized I had a message on my phone.  After listening to it I was so upset (yet trying to remain calm) and distracted (from trying to remain calm) that I almost became a shoplifter.  I walked right past the registers with stuff in my basket and luckily glanced down before walking out the doors just in time to turn around before I was tackled by security (at least that's how I like to imagine it).  Turns out I had been grossly misrepresented to someone who doesn't know me all that well (grrr).  I felt a lot better after calling this person back, but still.  And then not 10 minutes after that I found myself face to face in an unexpected encounter that did indeed leave me feeling completely powerless.  If I were to tell that tale you may think, "so what?".  But it's just one of those things that triggers some sort of childhood fear.  And don't ask because I don't want to talk about it (even I have my limits).  Ah, yes.  Fear rears it's ugly head. I can deny it no longer.  I was in tears.  I was really mad.  I did not want to go home like that so I went for a drive towards the mountains.  I decided that I would feel much better if I could just write something.  So I stopped at a little grocery store looking desperately for a pretty notebook.  Why is this so hard?  Why do "they" even make ugly things. I just don't understand.  I guess it's all relative. Anyway. I went with a basic black notebook and a mechanical pencil.  I found this nice sitting spot and wrote until I felt better.  Luckily it was in time to be in good enough spirits to head home and make a yummy dinner.  It was a gorgeous fall day outside.     
Even now, I'm trying to muster up the urge to feel better and try to comprehend what I know I have learned.  Still.  It makes me want to do something rash.  Do you ever think rash things can be done wisely?  Really all I'm wanting to do is move up the inevitable by a couple of months.  I think some of my best decisions have been very spontaneous.  And probably some of my worst. Hmmm. Lots to think and pray about.

I'm thankful for prayer.  And opportunities however they may come.

fairy bride princess kitty

Probably the best think about Chickie's ballet class is that there isn't a dress code.  Not really.  So she can wear this frou frou tu tu and they are cool with that.  (At least I'm pretty sure they are.)  Other than that she's not too keen on dance class.  I kept thinking she would be genetically predisposed to like it. I finally admit that I was wrong.  
When she does love something it's pretty obvious.  Like dressing up.  They had a silly day at school on Friday to celebrate Fall break!  Yea!  It lasts for three weeks and I am really looking forward to it!  Chickie was so excited about silly day.  She talked about it and planned all the silly things she would do.  Some of them were a little unrealistic because she also has a deep and lasting love for comfort.  Comfort is her truest love that rules over all of her other desires.
In school art class she made a bowl.  They hand built little bowls.  They learned all about Mr. Air Bubble and his friend Mrs. Glass.  She told me in great detail everything that they did and how it was going to be fired.  It really is the most excited I think I've seen her get about anything in school so far.  I'm trying to make a mental note of the things she really loves as a child.  Being a fan of the Self-Help category, I am reminded often to do the things you loved as a child (or try to remember them!).
I have a feeling that over the next three weeks there is going to be a lot of dressing up and imaginative play at our house.  As evidenced today by fairy bride and princess kitty.
I must say,  I'm very excited about it.  
It makes me absolutely giddy.  And it gives me this warm fuzzy feeling that everything is right in the world when I have a little one completely absorbed in play. I love love it!  And it gets even better when there are two children enjoying play time together.   It's so funny when Bentley and Chickie pretend to be dogs and kitties.  I give them carrot sticks and slices of green peppers and call them doggie bones.  They gobble them up! Ah, it makes me laugh.

What the?

First of all,  I didn't notice that the box of ice cream cones I bought said there were 60 inside.  I also didn't notice that the graphic on the front of the box said "actual size."  Seriously people, Could these cones BE any smaller?
Bentley didn't mind.
He ate two.  Chickie had three.  Between all the scooping and the amazing speed at which she scarfed hers down, I did not get a pic.  Sadly.
Second of all, did my daughter really just read me a book?  She even sounded out the word 'what'.  I am delighted and shocked all at the same time.  It's actually really cute. She is really starting to get it.  She sounds out everything she says.  SO great!

At her parent teacher conference, Mrs. Stedina said that Olivia's social and drawing skills are very advanced.  Her drawing skills are more like an end of the year kindergarten student.   ABC's and 123's are apparently a whole different story.  I do read to my kids A LOT.  Eh, at any rate, I'm just glad I decided not to homeschool.  What a relief kindergarten rocks!

Bedtime Beethoven LIVE

Have I mentioned before that Olivia LOVES classical music?  When she was a baby my great aunt Jean got her a set of bedtime music Cd's.  My favorite was Bedtime Beethoven.  She has been listening to it every night for almost 6 years now.   Whenever I dare listen to the radio, flipping through the stations thinking, "Why bother!"  She yells..."Wait!  Go back!"  It's always to the classical station.
Thursday night our local symphony orchestra came to our little town's amphitheater and gave a free concert.  Never mind the rain!  Never mind staying out past bedtime!  Did I actually say that?!!  Yes! Bedtime is a big deal for me  because my kids are monsters without adequate sleep.  BUT, I figured it was worth it for this kind of a cultural experience.  Being outside was a great way for us to be able to enjoy the music.  Not having to worry about getting all dressed up and sit still.  No way I could have normally taken Bentley to something like this if it was indoors.
It was great fun!  A little wet, a little tired, a little bit more cultured!
Speaking of really great free things;  we made these fun kitties from a free pattern at wee wonderfuls.
MEOW!  I hope everyone had a great, safe weekend.

happy land

Don't you want to join us in Happy Land?
It's very fun here.
Although we take play time very seriously....
it's still fun!  Did I mention that it was fun?

Acorns anyone?

Has it really been a whole week since I've posted anything?  I can hardly believe it!  I have been very busy work, work, working away.  I will hopefully have some very pretty things to show you in a couple of months.  
I actually love working.  At least what I'm doing right now. I love having a creative goal and being able to work, pretty much all the time...but at least it doesn't matter that I take 5 million breaks during the day to do things like make necklaces, and gather acorns.  Or at least supervise and direct such activities.  It definitely gives the weekend a whole new meaning (even if I do work a little, I seriously can't help myself).  I finished reading I Capture the Castle this weekend.  And I don't know. I'm perplexed. I was thoroughly prepared to LOVE it, love it.  But then I accidently saw the last few words before I was done.  So, I thought it meant that one thing was happening, but instead it was something totally different.  So I was a little baffled at the end.  And so I just started reading at the beginning all over again.  Which, I don't think I've ever done before, so I must like it. Right?  I would definitely recommend it, that's for sure!  What a quirky family!  Actually, I don't remember the last time I've laughed so much reading a book.
 I'm grateful for trees. I absolutely adore them.  I really do.  Although, I can't identify them at all.  Well, I know what a mimosa tree is that's a start. And of course I know my favorite tree which is the magnolia.  Evergreen, blossoming, fragrant.  If I were a tree I'd want to be a magnolia tree.  Yes, they also like to make a mess.  Just like me it's part of their creative process.  I would have to live in Chris's yard though, so he could clean up after me!  

funny fears?

I have been thinking about fears since my last post.  I don't like to focus on fears and feed their power.  That doesn't mean I don't have a big ol' closet of them.  I just don't like to open that door.

Here's one:  I'm afraid of posting my fears on my blog. 

I used to have silly fears when I was younger.  Heights, thunder, falling down in public... I don't think I have any silly fears anymore.  But maybe silly fears are never actually silly when you are really afraid of something.

Here's another one:  I'm afraid that there won't be any new foods that I'm not allergic to. 

OK.  Here's a funny falling down story, well sort of.  When I was in Highschool I used to run cross country.  For some reason I remember being worried that I would fall down at one particular race.  I kept whining to my coach about it.  Finally he said, "Look, if you actually do fall down you have my permission to just turn around and walk back."  I didn't fall down.  I also don't think I came in last that time.  Like I said, I love to run.  I never said I was very fast.  Does that prove the idea that it's always better to do the things we are afraid of? Hmmm.

My brother was very afraid to take his wiggly son on the Ferris Wheel, but he did it anyway!  He is afraid of heights.   But that was three years ago and I don't think he's done it again.  

I used to be afraid of sea food!! That's silly.  But now I brave it every once in a while.  Salmon mostly.

Do you have any funny fears?