things that don't go together, things that do

Nail polish + applique=

not good.

Especially because I forgot my topcoat. Or maybe this new brand is not good. The color is a dark purple. But it looks black, right? I'm probably too old and granny-ish to be wearing dark purple (could be confused with black) nail polish. But I think it's kinda fun.

Snow days + applique=

Very good! Look how much I've gotten done! (More than half of the smallest row.) Chris asked last night, "Is that your last row?!" (NO) Well maybe it would be if I hadn't devoted most of my snow days to sleep. Or if I were faster. But I'm pretty sure I can feel the speed gaining!

And well, I did bring dinner to my neighbors, the Birds. And I probably wouldn't have been up to it if it weren't for all the glorious sleep I've gotten.

sleep+good deed doing abilities= most excellent

P.S. I love that I live in a place that can be completely shut down by 5 inches of snow. It's like a spontaneous gift from nature!

10 things that make me happy

I found this list on a scrap of paper.

1. paper (Aches 88 is my fav! It's so gorgeously thick and smooth!)

2. mechanical pencils size .5

3. swing dancing

4. baby legs

5. kettle corn

6. my morning runs

7. self help books

8. making something, anything

9. pretty pictures

10. a day of reading snuggled up with a blanket

The pic is from my booth at a local gift fair last weekend.

Going to see New Moon tonight at midnight. So excited!

making lemonade

Figuratively speaking that is....

Sometimes life hands you big fat lemons. I feel like I've been getting too many of them lately. Don't you hate it when life feels like LIFE? Do you know what I mean? Sometimes life is just day to day enjoyable everyday silly problems. And sometimes you have to deal with the big things that aren't any fun at all. Like my Dad's mom (mamaw) dying. And my Dad's mom (Grammy) has what looks like a very aggressive cancer on top of failing kidneys. (I have two great dad's and I call them both Dad. It gets confusing.) I've been baking a lot this week. It's how I deal with things like that. Not good. We ran out of flour and had to go to Gigi's today. Had to. I don't want to do any more dishes.

The lemonade...a surprisingly fun post-funeral photoshoot with my cousin Jordy. He's one good lookin dude. When we were kids he was always making movies with my little sisters. Now he's in LA doing the actor thing.

As for the lemonade in the situation with my beloved Grammy...I'm going to see her Monday. So that's good. We were made from the same cloth. Two peas in a pod. I get her, she gets me. I only wish I were by her side already. Chris is going to brave it alone with the kids. He'll probably have everything in tip top shape. Can't say the same for what they may eat....now that's a scary thought. If you see my kids please sneak them a fruit or vegetable.

More lemons...my job with Lindsay Jane Photography. A super hard situation, because I love Todd and Lindsay so much and all their family. Lindsay taught me a lot and I will always be thankful for her in my life. Hopefully I'll be able to reciprocate in some way. But the job wasn't what we needed it to be. So I quit. Big fat depressing bummer. I was trying to wallow in my own pathetic situation, but no one would let me. And when my lawyer told me I needed to "move on with my life" well that was the last straw. I guess sometimes the people pleasing can be a hindrance. Who knew?

The lemonade... andrea larsen photo. Never in a million years did I see this one in my future. But people started calling me. And I have to have somewhere to put the pictures, right? So it's fun. Actually I've been having a blast. It's not quite done yet (the website, or anything else for that matter). It's pretty ghetto at this point, but it's a start. And the good news is that I've been busy. I had a newborn shoot this week, and a small family, and tomorrow I have a family of 33! Yikes. How I got this busy already??? A blessing.

Yes. Life is weird. Why can't things just work out like you planned them? Maybe this was too melancholy of an announcement? But I guess there is no helping that at this point. Too sum up: new job stuff, good. family stuff, bad. Must make lemonade tomorrow...and possibly lemon bars.

be brave

I was inspired by this quote by Paulo Coelho today:

Everyday-together with the sun- God gives us a moment in which it is possible to change everything that makes us unhappy.  Every day we try to pretend that we don't realize that moment, that it doesn't exist, that today is just the same as yesterday and will be the same as tomorrow.  But if you pay attention, you can discover the magic instant.  It may be hiding at the moment when we put the key in the door in the morning, in the silence right after dinner, in the thousand and one things that all seem the same to us.  This moment exists- a moment when all the strength of the stars passes through us and lets us work miracles.

Sometimes it's so hard to make those changes.  Sometimes something you thought would be wonderful doesn't end up being so great.  I was brave today.  And now I'm going to go eat some ice cream.

Today I'm grateful for new beginnings.

Happy Mother's Day to me!

Look how exhausted I looked!  Being a first time mom sure was a shock to the system!  Now I have these two gorgeous kids and I'm able to be a mom and have some artistic fun on the side.  I never would have believed that was possible 6 years ago.    
Chris took this sweet picture.  He's got a great eye.  I need to teach him to use my camera and then maybe there will be a few more pictures of me around.  I don't have many of my mom from when we were little.  

I have had the best day!  The kids brought me the greatest cards and coupons.  I redeemed the one for breakfast.  Olivia brought me a tray with the potted flower she made for me at school, an empty glass, a bowl with a little cereal and a whole lotta milk.  It was spilled all over the place.  Best breakfast I've ever had!  She had to go back for a spoon, napkin, and drink.  Meanwhile I redeemed my coupon for a foot rub from Bentley.  It was a little painful.  He scratched at my toes, tried to pull them off, and tried twisting my legs!  I was laughing so hard.  Chris was nice enough to finish it off.  They totally pampered me today and I feel very loved and appreciated.  

I'm so grateful for the moms in my life.  I get to see my mom later this week!  I'm so excited.  And I will get to see my grammy in June!  

so good

Can I give you the play by play of my day because it was really great?!  Ok. excellent.  

It started out with a run, a good one.  
Then I went to the temple.  I volunteered to do laundry there once a month.  And today was my first day.  I got set apart and everything!  (I realize that's a really Mormon thing to say and I kind of don't know how to explain it any other way.  They gave me a sweet blessing to do my job.  That's probably the best explanation of getting 'set apart').  AND I get my very own white name tag!  I was very excited.  It was so relaxing to have a few hours of QUIET.  Ah, heaven.  As I was walking down the temple hall with a basket full of white laundry I had this overwhelming feeling that I really belong there.  Something about doing laundry, such an intimate task, made me feel so at home.  The temple is so peaceful and so beautiful.  It was a really great experience.  
Then I came home to a newly painted kitchen.  Chris does an amazing amount of things when he's home with the kids.  I don't see how he does it sometimes.  And he picked out the color himself and it looks great!    I love the rockstars diary blog.  I had read about her going to gigi's cupcakes as part of her roadtrip.  The girl loves food.  It's too funny.  So since it's in the neighborhood we decided to check it out.  And while we were there well who should walk in but the lovely Gigi herself.  We had a quick little chat and she gave us an extra cupcake for free.  Thank you Gigi!  They were SOOOO so so so good!  We each got a Hunka Chunka Banana Love.  De-licious.  She said it was her best recipe.  I would have to agree. Although, I'm partial to banana.  And the Almond Joy was incredible.  The one you see here is the white midnight magic chocolate chip.  It's the only one that made it home in one piece.  It's gone now.  I brought my camera with me but not my CF card. How lame, it's a horrible habit I've gotten myself into and it must end.

Chris finishing off the Almond Joy. 

You think that's the end.  It's not.  But perhaps this post is long enough.  I shall save it for another day.

I'm thankful for today.  It was awesome.

to the rescue

This morning the sight of this made me cry.  Here's why.  Chris gets home from work really late most nights.  Last night he got home around 10 I think. We talked for about an hour.  We told each other about our days.  

The kids spent most of the day playing outside yesterday even though it was kind of chilly.  At one point Chickie called to me that something horrible had happened.  All the tassels had been pulled off of her bike and were lying on the ground.  Everyone of them.  It was a most sad and pathetic sight indeed.  She bawled inconsolably for a while.  I hugged her.  I didn't blame her one bit for how she was feeling.  It was a great loss for her.  I said, "tomorrow first thing I'll go to Hobby Lobby and get some pretty ribbons.  We can hot glue them on."  She broke out of her sobs for long enough to paint me a little picture (figuratively speaking) of how those tassels whip through the wind when she's riding her bike.  She loves the crinkly sound they make and how they let her know that she's going faster and faster.  They are basically the cherry on top of riding a bike.  Better than the basket.  Better than the horn.  Better than pink princesses.  It's all about the tassels.  

So when I saw those tassels back on the bike this morning I thought of my husband outside at 11:00 hot glueing those strands back on one by one.  It made me cry.  I love him.  Only just now did I realize that he probably brought the bike inside.  Still.  THANK YOU, BABE!  You're THE best!  He's our knight in shining armor!

I'm so thankful for my husband.

things my kids teach me

It's easy to be happy.
It's fun to learn to do new things...even when they seem hard to reach.
And of course, stop and smell the roses.
Don't just smell them, really get in there and roll your nose around in them!

I sure do love these two...

Hello Nashville!!

To greet our new town we have been doing LOTS of exploring!
Partly to get to know our new town...
And partly to scout out future photo spots.
Photo shoot locations are needed when you are training for your NEW JOB with Lindsay!
Wish us luck!!  I am SO grateful to have this new opportunity to LEARN!! 

I am also so grateful that miss Chickie's new school experience is going very well!  I really didn't have high expectations at all.  Her last school was just so amazing.  However, I am blown away!  And we can walk to school since we only live .3 miles from it.  The girls in her new class shouted with squeals of joy when she was introduced to them.  (what a relief!)  AND the best news yet...we only live 3.5 miles from the temple! I seriously get chocked up every time I think about it.  What a huge spiritual opportunity! yay!

Oh, and one more thing...we rented out our house today! What a blessing and a relief (yes, another).   

life lessons

Did I mention that I found out I have the skin version of Celiac Disease?  It's called DH for short. This is my self diagnosis.  I haven't been officially diagnosed yet.  But the cause is gluten and the result is excruciatingly painful blisters on an isolated spot in the body.  For me being my hands.  As I've eliminated all these things from my diet I have healed my hands. I have an almost instant reaction (basically overnight) to anything I eat.  So it's pretty clear what is a culprit and what isn't.  I have additional allergies to dairy, corn, and nuts.  Although I haven't tried all nuts.  
A friend of mine brought over a whole gluten-free care package. How sweet is that!?  She made me two loaves of this rice bread. I couldn't wait for the picture I had to take a bite first. It was really good.  I ate two pieces.  I had known that she was a really healthy eater, I just hadn't known why.  

I made this discovery last Saturday.  Which probably contributed significantly to my ultra bad day.  I was feeling pretty sorry for myself.  It's a lot overwhelming. But I'm trying to move past it and just get healthy. 

I went through a difficult trial a few years ago and felt really sorry for myself for a long time. After it was over I realized all I could have learned from it.  So I made a pact with myself not to wait for the end of something difficult to realize the good that could be learned from the situation.  One thing I have learned from this is the importance of asking questions to get answers.  You really can't get answers if you aren't persistent.  I started having symptoms for this almost 6 years ago. Right after Olivia was born.  I thought it was severe eczema due to the increase in hand washing. Or perhaps a soap allergy.  In the past 6 years I have tried everything in relation to my own original conclusion.  No one offered me a different solution. Not even a dermatologist.  But the responsibility is my own. And I never once opened my mind to alternative ideas regarding the matter.  I am a Relief Society teacher in my church.  This last Sunday's lesson just reiterated to me the importance of meditation and prayer.  Sometimes I feel like in the journey of life I'm a slow learner.  Somehow it takes me years to figure things out.  I am so grateful for the loving care of a Heavenly Father. I feel that He tenderly teaches me through my life's trials and triumphs.  I'm grateful to have learned something new. Something my body has been screaming at me for 6 years. I finally listened. Finally got the message.    Figuring out the specifics will apparently be a life long journey.  But I'm sure it will be worth it. It already is.  I wish I could explain better how spiritual this whole ordeal is for me.  I guess it's just another very real example of how sometimes doing the more difficult thing is actually easier.  Although there is a mourning period for the loss of old behaviors (popcorn and a movie).  But now that I have the knowledge I can't not live this way.  Now that I know that something I thought of as normal is causing me significant pain, I can't not live the way I now know is right.  I know there will be a transition period that will be difficult. Learning the new behaviors (how to make gluten- free cookies) will be a process of trial and error, but in the end it will be worth it!  My quality of life just sky rocketed.  

Heather, Heather, Heather

Chickie went to a birthday party yesterday.  She had the best time ever!
Our buddy Addison turned 7!  I seriously can't believe he is that old.  I have been friends with his mom since before either of us were married.  And when Chickie was born we started switching out babysitting.  For a couple of years Addison and I had a standing Fri night date night since Chris worked Friday nights. We usually watched Toy Story, from what I remember.   
Here is Addison's mom Heather.  Let me introduce you if you haven't met.  Heather's favorite sandwich is a turkey sub, and her favorite place to get one is at Lenny's Sub Shop.
The best word I can use to describe her is cool.  She just is. She's laid back and daring at the same time.  Is that possible?  We were out with the kids one day and we saw this vine hanging down.  She was the first one to test it out!  Turns out it was strong enough for all of us to take a swing, just not all at once.  

So let me finish telling you about the party (even though I wasn't actually there)...
I think the grown ups may have had a more fun than the kids.  Chris caught Ryan cheating when he was racing Sophia.  There's no denying it now Ryan, what do you have to say for yourself!?
Heather took her races just as seriously.  Nothing got in her way, not even breaking her foot!
Yeah, that's right.  Does this look like the face of someone in serious pain?  

I had to stay home with sick Bentley, so I called her later to find out all of the details.  She was laughing hysterically when she told me that it was fractured and she has to wear a temporary cast that goes up to her knee.  First thing monday morning she has to make an appointment to get a real cast.  

That's why I love you Heather!  Actually that's not even half of it.  Hope you can work out the whole pushing the gas pedals with the crutches thing!  I'll take you to the mall parking lot if you need to practice first.

I'm grateful for my friend Heather.

breath

Yesterday mid-afternoon Bentley got a fever.  He seemed perfectly happy to keep playing and so I wasn't too concerned.  Later that night, I heard a very faint whimpering type noise, I thought it was Olivia waking up as she often does.  At first I ignored it and when the noise continued I went to check on her.  Turns out it was Bentley in his bed having a seizure.  I have never felt panic or fear to that extent before. I wasn't completely sure if it was a seizure at that point. I thought he might be choking.  I called 911 and as I was giving my address and an update on Bentley's condition he started to cry.  I was so relieved because I knew then that he could breathe.  It's really a miracle that I had enough brain capacity to make calls to get people over to watch Olivia (a neighbor for the immediate time, and grandparents for the long haul).  We only live 5 minutes from the hospital, which is why I chose to drive. I parked semi-illegally and ran in holding him, tears streaming down my face.  I was holding it together enough to not be frantic, to do what had to be done.  When they asked me his name and birth date, those were seriously the hardest questions I have ever been asked.  I said his first and middle name followed by the birth month and year.  It took me until he was calmed down and doctors and nurses working on him until I was able to think of the actual birth date.  Turns out he had a febrile seizure.  It is caused by a sudden spike in temperature.   He is perfectly fine today. No fever, nothing.  I have never even heard that this is something that could happen.  And he does have a greater chance of having them again if he gets sick, but other than that they pose no threat.  From what I can understand, only children under 5 get these types of seizures.  
When we got home from the ER this huge praying mantis was on the outside of the house.  When grandpa and grandma Larsen left he came on in.  I was taking pictures of him and he looked over directly at me and did his prayer pose.  I took it as a good omen.  This little guy came to pray for us.  I slept on the floor in Bentley's room.  As I was making a huge pile of blankets for myself to sleep on I realized that everyone of those blankets had been hand made by family members that love us.  I felt that love wrapped all around me as I lay there and listened to the most beautiful sound, that of my son breathing.  Of course I couldn't sleep.  Just lay there and listen.  
I feel complete and total gratitude for my children and their precious lives.  I put a big pillow down on the floor before I knelt to pray this afternoon after we returned from the doctor.  I knew I would be down there for a while.

joy

Today is the best!

breakthrough

Isn't this little plant the poster child for breakthroughs?  I had a couple myself over the past couple of days.  That's right.   Breakthroughs, not breakdowns! yay!   Well, I did almost have a breakdown over my allergy detective work.  I managed for 5 1/2 whole days on the fruit, veggie, and a little meat diet.  In the mean time my eczema completely cleared up.  And I was completely miserable.  I got several, "Are you OK?"s.  I pretended like I was but I wasn't fooling anyone.   On the fifth day I decided I would rather have food in all it's glory than be eczema  free, but at the same time I was still wanting to pinpoint the culprit.  To make a long, very boring story short. I didn't make it through the sixth day.  I was feeling light headed by the end of the day.  I guess I'm just too active to eat like that.  Logically, it doesn't make that much sense to me because I had quadrupled the normal quantity of foods that I eat.  I wasn't satisfied, but I didn't expect to become dizzy.  I did dance for an hour and a half with Chris and I had my first night of a jazz class that night.  Anyway, at least I know it is a food allergy.  There is always acupuncture.
That brings me to my second breakthrough.  Chris told me that I had one in my dancing!  And he also said that he is getting really excited about my progress.  That is such a huge deal to me.  Maybe it shouldn't be, but he tells it like it is when it comes to dance, and he has very high standards.  So for him to say that is---well, it's a first.  Just as a back ground Chris and I had the best summer ever swing dancing together, we started dating that summer.  It was magical.  Dancing, falling love.  Perfect.  Chris went on to become a well trained ballroom dancer, and I finished up my art degree and had our babies.  I miss the time when we were equally yoked in the dancing department.  Playing catch up has been no fun at times.  Painful at times, wishing for the fun days of the past.  I've had to really suck up my pride and deal with it.  I'm so glad it's finally starting to feel worth it. Yay!   Slowly, but surely, kind of like the progress on my chairs.  When you look at what I started with, it's so difficult to see the possibility of beauty in pile of trash.  Now that some of the sanding is done, it's starting to seem more realistic.

 I'm not giving up...  just like that little plant.  Starting to see the sun!

I'm grateful for slowly but surely.  Progress. Breakthroughs. Hope!

farewell processed foods! till we meet again...

We made our own apple juice today.
Ooh, I never quite realized what a beast our microwave is...at least we have a rockin' juicer.
Yum.  Doesn't that look pretty.
And last night, instead of my normal bowl of ice cream, I had steak for a snack.  WHY?  Well, I was really hungry after a day of only fruits and veggies.  WHY?  I'm hoping you all are sympathetic because this is the saddest story ever.   I have this horrible, no good, wakes me up at night painful, eczema on my hands.  True story.  And I only aquired it after giving birth.  At first it was restricted to the area under my wedding ring.  Now it's pretty much everywhere on my palms.  It's not completely repulsive, I don't think anyone really notices unless I point it out. And it does come and go. And more than see it I can feel it. BUT.  I am now trying trying to figure out if its some kind of food allergy, because the creams don't do jack.  So sad, I have to eat only fruits, veggies, and meat for the next little bit, and then introduce other foods one by one.  I kind of think it's yeast.  Which is sad.  But we'll see. Some places I've read say not to eat meat either.  Not that I usually eat much meat, but what is going to make me full?  Am I just supposed to chew until my mouth starts hurting?  And what about energy for running and dancing?  I'll have to check and see if I can eat some nuts.  That would be helpful.  Wish me luck with my investigating!

But seriously, I'm so thankful for all the beautiful, delicious fruits and veggies out there! YUM!  And for food in general (so yummy), and for our bodies being so smart to alert us of dangerous allergies by whatever means necessary!

Day 29: sort of...

On Sunday I went to church, got two really awesome packages in the mail just for fun from two of my favorite people, and then took my Grammy to the walk- in clinic, but we ended up spending most of the day in the ER.  not fun.  She hurt her knee on the trip, and they were afraid of a possible blood clot because of all the travel.  She didn't have one luckily.   And the doc fixed her up for the rest of the trip.  Needless to say, no pics on actual day 29 so these are still from day 28.

On Saturday we crossed a suspension bridge.

Bentley really wanted in the water, so did all the kids.  My dad kept Bentley happy for a while...
Then cool aunt Darcy had an idea, "Let's go to that side of the river, without all the rocks!"
It wasn't long before all the kids were in the water, clothes an all.  Well, some with more clothes than others.  I was pretty uptight about the whole ordeal.  I was worried about the cute dress Chickie had on.  Laundry is my worst home making skill.  (I'm really bad at getting stains out and ironing.  Although, I'm a pretty stellar folder, thanks to all those years working at the mall.)  But how can you argue with this much felicity?  

That's why we all love Darcy so much!  I love spending time with her.  She is so much fun.  It's a good thing she was with us at the ER!

I'm grateful for being with family, learning to relax, and that the trip to the ER turned out well in the end with Grammy feeling much better the next day.

Day 25: the perfect day for a thunderstorm

A view of our living room.  Forts included.
Don't you want to kiss them?   Sweet baby feet.
This is what I worked on.

Today, I'm thankful for thunderstorms, rain, and bed time.